Hi.

Well hello there, ;)


I am a silly girl with fantastical dreams. And I have fantastically failed at achieving any of them. But The fight isn't over yet. That's one thing I know I am good at. I love a good fight. I strive on challenges and I get a kick out of waiting for the last possible minute to accomplish anything. So just so you know, there may be lapse in between the times that I write, and more than likely I will be fighting the same fight. Whew, I am glad we got that out of the way. I like it better when people know what to expect of me. It is a big weight off my shoulders, although weight in general is it's own chapter in my life. I wish I could take all the time I have spent talking about calories, fat grams, working out, and trying on clothes that I know aren't going to fit me and bottle it up. I would give all that wasted time to someone who could change the circumstances of other peoples' lives for the better. Then that time would be better well spent. But since that is impossible, I want to take the time I do have left on this earth and fulfill some of my dreams of helping other people. I want to make a drastic difference. In the past I have held myself back because of insecurities. I have this victim mentality, I believe all other people will see is my weight. And therefore wouldn't want my help. But I have opened up a lot in the past couple of years. And thanks to some of my perspectives being shifted and some words of encouragement from loved ones I now see the world slightly less askewed. I finally see that no matter what I will be judged. It's an automatic response. But I have also found that I have the power to change peoples' perceptions. So thats what I want to do this year. Change peoples' perceptions of me. I plan on being involved in many things. And I am EXPECTING a lot of my friends to support me as well as give of themselves. So stay tuned for some of my ideas. In the mean time I am going to get some homework done. :)